Apologies to Zero Mostel!

Vol. 1 Chap. 632 

 

 

Apologies to Zero Mostel! 

 

 

You Get the Feeling Someone’s Sad? 

You Get the Feeling Someone’s Glad? 

You Get the Feeling That It Might 

Somehow Be Related to Height? 

 

Well Give Yourself a Big Gold Star! 

Go Tell the World How Right You Are! 

My House Has Seen a Cosmic Shift! 

It’s Like I’ve Been Given That Gift 

That I’ve Wanted Since I Was Small, 

“Please God! Please God, Can I Be Tall?” 

Prayed Like That Fiddler on the Roof! 

I’m Serious! This Ain't No Goof! 

You Who Made Lion and the Lamb 

You Decree I Am What I Am 

Would It Spoil Some Vast, Grand Cabal 

If I Were a Statuesque Gal? 

 

And I’m Quite Sure No One’s Thinking 

Mom’s Height’s Maxed Out. Now She’s Shrinking! 

‘Sides, It Should Come as No Surprise, 

There’s More to Mom Than Meets the Eyes! 

Your Grampa Sure Loves Y'All! 

 

Love~Grampa 

If You Don't Mind!

 

 

Vol. 1 Chap. 631 

 

 

If You Don’t Mind! 

 

 

Y'Know My Fam'ly Is Quite Weird!  

By Weird I Mean They’re Just Not Geared 

To Your Social Amenities! 

They Mask It Well By Saying, “Please!” 

 

And, “Thank You!” and, “If You Don’t Mind”! 

But Check Closer and You Will Find 

Your Friendly Neighborhood Gingers 

Just May Be the Dark Harbingers  

 

Of Blood Sucking, Hungry Vampires! 

Next Thing You Know, What Transpires, 

There’s Blood On Mom and Aud’s White Fangs!  

Truth Be Told, I’ve Developed Pangs! 

 

Mom’s Favorite Drink, Bloody Mary! 

Just How Bloody? Very, Very! 

And It Should Come as No Surprise, 

When Audrey Flirts, She BATS Her Eyes! 

 

They Just Don’t See That It Pained Me! 

Like That Time That They De~Brained Me! 

Don’t I Need My Cerebellum? 

“We Ate It! Not Like We Sell'm!” 

April Fools My Peeps! 

Your Grampa Sure Loves Y'All! 

 

Love~Grampa